Fuzzy

Despite the work that has to be accomplished until next week, I feel better now. Except for some minor glitches regarding Subic (it's something not worth narrating in full), the pace is more relaxed. We're doing good medal-wise and hope this goes on until the closing on Monday.

I look forward to the evenings for an unusual reason. It's something I've never experienced or felt in my entire life until now. Now I understand why my coupled friends look at it this way.

It's comforting to end the day just relaxing and being with someone. It feels great to talk, laugh and be silly without feeling self-conscious about it. It is special to fall asleep in someone's arms and wake up the following morning still beside that person. And yes, you don't need sex to say that you've slept with someone.

No, I'm not "living in" with him-- I wish we were. But I do find mornings very different when I see him get ready for the day. It's amazing how you really know your other half through his habits, idiosyncrasies and preferences when you two stay in a place on your own. It can be amusing, irritating, shocking, surprising, tempting (hehe!) ... yet the bottomline is that prior impressions are altered and his real personality comes out.

I do miss home. But I'll miss him more when I have to return to my parents' abode. It won't be the same as kissing him goodnight and waking up the next morning together.

The Games Have Begun

Courtesy of Philippine Daily Inquirer

The fireworks were lovely, though I think the presentation wasn't worth its budget.

The next eight days is a test of mettle for everyone involved in this event. It will take the Philippines another 12 years before we host this again. By then, I hope everything will be smoother and prepared better.

Nevertheless, it is a perfect opportunity for us to show our best.

Go Pilipinas!

PS. I miss blogging about other things. Unfortunately, these are not in my current realm of consciousness.

Stuff to Smile About

I'm not using my postpaid mobile line from tomorrow until 21 December as it has been too costly to coordinate with people and not having the office pay for my mobile phone bill. As such, I was forced to purchase a new Globe prepaid SIM pack, this one I lose count as to my ownership of these (I think my friends know this more than I do).

Anyway, I'd been long wanting to get a Globe prepaid number beginning with the 0917 numerical prefix. Stocks of this first batch was last released about two years ago. I even had a number from this series (253.1189) four years ago but I lost the SIM card along with another Smart prepaid SIM card the year after.

Since then, I had been in a quest for another number from this series. Most establishments don't sell this series anymore: recent series out in the market include prepaid numbers starting with 0906, 0907, 0915, 0916, 0926 and 0927. I've put off buying a Globe prepaid SIM for years for this reason. I've even asked friends with old 0917 prepaid numbers to sell their SIM cards to me (this however was a failed endeavor).

Yesterday, I decided to buy a new prepaid SIM pack. Boss Joey also wanted a Globe prepaid number ending with the numeral 8 (it's his personal thing). So off I went to the Mall Near Work to buy two Globe prepaid SIM packs. I was bent on rather getting 0915's as they looked and sounded better (my personal thing).

And surprise ... a small stall was selling 0917 prepaid packs, one with a good numeral 8-laden combination that I was sure Joey would prefer. However, these packs were sold for P200.00 each, P50 more than the available SIM packs. Oh, what the heck. This was for me a gem of a errand.

Now I need to get a second-hand mobile phone unit. And don't worry non-work friends, my postpaid line stays put.

*****

It's been very difficult and tiring to go home late at night recently. So I was very much relieved when I found out that I could already check in a nearby hotel tomorrow night until the SEAG's end. Now I've to pack my things for a good twelve days away from home, but it's no sweat compared to the work I've been doing the past weeks.

I'll miss my bed and CD player though. Can't have your share of cake all the time, I guess.

I Need to Purge Here

Yes, I am in another bout of tension and nerves here in the office. It seems that many people don't understand how toxic things have been for the past weeks.

Suddenly, I feel so dumb, that I've screwed up things. I try to get my things in order, believe me. It's just so difficult to manage them. I have my staff to do the field work, but still I'm tied to other major obligations.

When friends found out about this current task, most could only shake their heads in disbelief and offer their condolences for the difficult work ahead of me (trust me, it's a committee no decent human being should be assigned to).

I know, I'm still whining about this. I'm really sorry. It's just that I can't verbally tattle on this to people, particularly since the one I depend on psychological and emotional support is himself overwhelmed with his work.

I'm beginning to hate this, but I should keep focus. Pray for me please!

New Look

This blog's supposed to have a pictorial background, but apparently my old settings have left their mark on my base template, so the color's still the same as the old lay-out's, but the text is formatted on a eye-friendlier text style and the contents have more or less a more uniform look.

I'm pretty happy with the new look (which I did to purge myself from work-related stress), but I'm not sure if this post will come out with my requisite one-line space between paragraph (am too lazy to edit all previous texts to insert spaces between their paragraphs). I wish I knew how to change templates without it affecting lay-outs of previous posts onscreen.

Anyway, six days to go before the Big Disaster of an Event and we're barely surviving with the sudden requirements we suddenly have to comply for the team which in the first place was supposed to have been fixed by other entities I'd rather not mention.

Confronting another minor glitch regarding preparations at this minute. Yeesh.

P.S.: Alych, nice to have seen you last night. Sorry for being late though. That was good crepes we had back there, by the way.

Lackluster Magic

I had to take a breather from work and catch up with my movie viewing (the last flick I saw in the cineplex was Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith), so I tagged along with Apple and Reynard to catch the last full show of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire at The Fort's Metro Metro.

I had read the book and loved it, not minding the enormous number of pages I had to browse through to grasp the story. Coupled with the cinematic accuracy of the first three books when these were brought to life on the silver screen, I was looking forward to see Goblet. But through the middle of the film (approximately two hours running time), I was getting disillusioned with it for the following reasons:

1. Some related yet vital parts in the book were omitted in the movie, which somehow contributed to the screenplay's incoherent flow. Clue: let's just say that you won't be seeing any elves this time around.

2. The book plot's on Rita Skeeter could've been omitted all together from the film version. She appears as a nosy, sensationalism-capitalizing journalist, yet the movie fails to explain her presence in the flashback court scene and its significance in the story-- which in contrast was presented thoroughly in print.

3. I wouldn't have minded a three-hour-long Potter movie as long as the storyline and inter-relation of storylines were as clear as crystal. Two hours wasn't enough for magic to weave its way through this viewer's heart. Too much shortcuts to the end in this case.

4. Those who haven't read the book will find this particular segment of the seven-part series confusing and full of loopholes to fill. Reynard (who didn't read Goblet) commented on the way home that if we (Apple and I) found it "lacking in its original essence", some parts of the movie weren't very clear to him-- and most probably to other non-Potter readers who haven't watched or plan to see it.

5. Yes, the movie was fast-paced, but The Prisoner of Azkhaban's visual and special effects are still to beat.

6. I still think Alfonso Cuaron is the best director for the Potter movie series.

Nevertheless, do watch it-- Harry, Ron and Hermoine are still as spunky as ever. And Ralph Fiennes actually fit the role of Lord Thou-Shall-Not-Be-Named to a T.

I just hope The Order of the Phoenix will be waaaaayyyyy better than this one.

Feeling Heavy and Ugly

My current dominion.

Have you been so swamped with work that your head just feels like it weighs a ton and you feel so dragged?

Have you been too immersed in work that you unintentionally neglect other pertinent aspects and people in your everyday realm of existence?

Have you suddenly gained the urge to just drop everything and get away from the hustle and bustle in the hope that you may retain even just a tinge of your sanity?

Have you wanted to just smash up your work area and walk out of the office to take a fresh breath of air and settle yourself down amidst frustration and pressure?

Have you suddenly felt so dumb despite of others' opinion that you're the best (wo)man for the job?

Have you just felt so physically, psychologically, mentally and emotionally drained that when you get home, all you want to do to sleep?

Have you been in touch with most people mainly through SMS and mobile phone due to your unpredictable schedule despite wanting to see them-- to the point that you forget to respond to a missed call or text message?

This is the life I currently lead and will do so for a month. And should I not be able to update this blog as much as I usually do for that period, bear in mind that I'm just temporarily buried under a pile of papers and responsibilities.

Can't wait to end this madness. Am counting the days starting now ....

*****

I've never been this tense in my entire life. I've never felt so pressured in my entire career. And these days, people see the worst of me, sadly in a literal sense:

1. Face is breaking out again, the worst it has this calendar year.

2. Eyebags are getting bigger; undereye circles darker and more pronounced.

3. Hair is dry, badly needs a spa or hot oil treatment (which I wonder will be my free time to have these)

4. Stress has caused me to start nailbiting again. Ragged nails = harrased and stressed moi

5. Eyebrows are constantly raised or crinkled (depending on the situation at hand), not to mention unthreaded for the past weeks (eeew!)

6. Even fashion sense is affected: comfort is the current consideration over, uh, looking really girly.

All these reflect how I'm feeling right now; it sucks.

And This Is Merely Pre-Panic...

Time is ticking so fast yet I still don't know how to fix my Team RP secretariat work at the soonest possible time without any frigging hitches.

Yesterday's pace at the office was a mere drop on the tongue. All committee heads had to present their action plans, various requirements and operational needs to the bosses. I felt so stumped when it was my turn. I did prepare what I had to get for my committee to work, but personnel requirements are a b*tch to complete. One prospective member backed out, only for me to find out that he chose to be in another committee. Based on information from an officemate, another prospective member (the first one I talked into being in my team) might not be with me after all-- her immediate superior at work prefers her to be with the PHILSOC instead (goddarn a**!) and she hasn't spoken to me about it yet. Meanwhile, another committee head (of the same group that Prospect #1 eventually joined) wants to get another person I chose for my committee. Good thing my satellite venue staffing is set. Ironically, it's the homebase I'm still having problems with.

It was also yesterday when I realized the brevity of my function in the secretariat. I've always been used to handling secretariat operations, the technical side of each project my agency instigates or is involved in. Administrative matters are not much of my forte, and it seems a bad idea to head something I'm not very familiar with. But as I was chosen to manage this particular committee, I couldn't refuse, though I did make clear that I was uncomfortable with it.

There's still so much to do: bookings, follow-up, directing my staff to fix other documents and particulars according to my instructions, securing a final budget, ensuring that my staff gets the necessary perks and benefits from this task, finalizing what needs to be done and making sure that the national team complies with each and every provision we enforce.

But these are nothing to my current office workload (which is also a b*tching burden right now as I have deadlines and there's too much in my hands at this point).

I'm stressed, worried, cranky, trying to focus my mind on what needs to be done first but scared sh*t of everything involved. I'm pressured to do my best, to prove naysayers wrong, not to disappoint the people who gave me this responsibility because they believe I can do it. I need to FOCUS.

+@#&!#@, kakayanin ko ba ito?! (Sonofab*tch, will I be able to I hack this?!)

*****

In other news, I join everyone else in welcoming baby Matthew Gabriel Lopez Quimpo to this big, big world we live in. Cheers to his parents, especially his mommy extraordinaire.

Access Granted

I was checking e-mail a while ago when I chanced upon a message from The Ex. I know some of you will be infuriated to learn that we are still in touch. But c'mon, he was a friend before we embarked on that craziness that spanned a million miles and lasted for four years.

Anyway, he sent a short letter along with this Powerpoint slide file of good wishes and love. And it just spoke volumes that I found myself crying in my work area.

We had great times together despite the fact that it was never meant to be. And admittedly, I miss him, especially as my confidante and support. I wish he was here to see how good I've been doing careerwise these days; he would have reveled in pride.

But I had to move on. And he doesn't have a clue that I'm now with someone else. Sometimes I want to tell him, though I surmise it will create chaos if he finds out about it at this time. Nevertheless, he deserves to know that I'm happy, and he will when it's the right time to do so.

I just hope he's back on track. While some of you think he is perfectly fine, I feel otherwise. The concern may be uncalled for. Nevertheless, he remains a significant part of my life, and we will always have something to laugh about and reminisce on that made us who, how and why we are such today.

Twenty Random Things About Me

Via, here's to tagging me for this.

Pardon me for being a bit odd, but well, we are unique as individuals right?

1. I constantly tune in to 923 Joey FM before I fall into deep slumber at the end of the day.

2. I need a weekly dose of chocolate.

3. I chew my food on both sides of my teeth in an equal number of times every single meal.

4. My meal isn't complete if it's not composed of a meat viand, a vegetable side dish and rice.

5. I eat the sides of a sandwich before I get to its center.

6. I still keep my NKOTB albums and refuse to part with them.

7. I can finish a 500-page book in three hours.

8. I look very much like my father but am more of my mother's alter ego.

9. I prefer older men because they are more mature, patient and understanding than guys my age.

10. I had wanted to study in the Ateneo since the fifth grade.

11. Despite being in my high school glee club, I (still) have extreme stage fright.

12. I have a soft spot for golden retrievers.

13. I had asthma as a child.

14. I started nailbiting when I was in kindergarten ... and I haven't really stopped.

15. I have had articles published in the Manila Bulletin.

16. I am somewhat insomniac.

17. Work takes up most of my times these days that I barely go out on gimmicks.

18. I am desperate to fully edit this blog's template.

19. I am sooo in love and happy right now!

20. As I write this, I have just finished a special committee meeting at work that went on for 7 hours!

I tag Candice, Russelle, Jay, Ganns and Jehan to answer this as well.

Am leaving the office. Another long weekend beckons ....

168

The department store along Soler Street in Manila's Divisoria area, that is. Named after supposedly auspiciously lucky numbers for the Chinese, it is the current shopping mecca, outselling neighboring Tutuban Center and the traditional bangketas. With three floors (the top floor entirely devoted to palate-teasing delicacies; my friends and I weren't able to try them though), it's a breeze to shop in as air conditioning abounds. However, I don't recommend going there on weekends and holidays as throngs of people go there for massive shopping.

We arrived at 10:30 and roamed the place until noontime, after which we went to Tutuban Center for lunch at Chowking (there was a legitimate reason to devour their Sweet and Sour Pork Lauriat meal, hehe!). We were supposed to go home after that but ended up going around for more finds for another hour before reaching the parking lot for Valentine (Reynard and Apple's trusty Corolla).

Above is one of the bigger stalls at the second floor featuring assorted candles, scented or otherwise, big or small, plain or colored, whatever tickled your fancy and suits your needs. It was a big hit as people were trooping to cemeteries to visit their departed loved ones that weekend.

Next are things I bought from 168 and Tutuban that afternoon. Unfortunately, my mobile phone camera isn't thant trusty and the pics came out somewhat different in color than in real life due to poor indoor lighting when these were taken:

Orange blouse (originally priced at P250.00, got it for P200.00): liked the color (of course, my favorite) and its beaded detail. Straps are strung through a loop at the back and tied together to secure the blouse. It was really cute, but I made the mistake of not fitting it first before buying it. I can wear it, but it fits snugly around my upper body-- which isn't much of my thing. I'd have to lose some weight for it to fit more comfortably. I can wait for it to be more wearable ... but I'm also of giving this to Ate Kelly for Christmas.

Green blouse (P99.75): yes, there is a P99.75 Store in Tutuban Center. I liked the color and its pastel beading which matches my bracelet set. Yet I still made the mistake of not trying it on before purchasing it, so it really doesn't fit me (actually I noticed that available clothes' sizes in the area aren't quite my range; it practically shoves the hard reality to my face that I need to lose weight!). My mom's buying this from me to give it to someone. Drat. I liked this item a lot!

MFG wallet (originally at P120.00, got it for P100.00): it's red in color and nifty to carry. Needed to buy a new one as my old white money stasher is literally tattered. One thing I consistently do with new wallets: put a crisp bill in it that is not meant to be spent even in desperate times for good luck. Feeling good about it, I folded a P100 bill into its coin compartment (which I won't use as it deforms the wallet) in hopes that I won't run out of cash when called for.

Puma sports shoes (P300.00): got these also in Tutuban as The Boss advised me that open-toed sandals and the like won't be allowed during our RP Team Secretariat duty (as we are hosting an international event, we have to look more, er, decent with a sense of formality; thus the closed shoes rule). I don't relish wearing my Asics and Nike cross trainers the entire time, much less my closed toe slip-ons. This pair is comfy, cute and cool to the eyes. Heehee. Can't wait to wear it.

Beaded thong sandals (P300.00; P350.00 in Tiendesitas): the straps are actually gray in color though it deceives you as beige at first glance. I fell in love with these as I can wear these with my plain blouses (beadings match my tops' colors). They are also comfy and durable. Mama says though that the soles of this make fade fast, so I can't really wear them out on a regular basis like my usual treatment to other new pairs.

Rubber Havaianas-like slippers (P150.00 each; P200.00 in Tiendesitas): my eyes lit up when I saw a big stall selling these, so I got the chance and bought two pairs in white and mocha. I already have black Havas and I use them only when necessary (that pair's pretty expensive, so you know what I mean). I've to use the white pair; maybe when the rains stop so they won't get too dirty. The mocha pair's for the house. Last night at Tiendesitas, I bought a red pair with embellishments on its straps for P220.00. Wearing it this Friday (I hope!).

These meanwhile are Christmas gifts for some officemates (I won't say what these are nor how much they cost). They're really cute. Yes, I started Christmas shopping already, but I'm definitely not through with it yet. I also bought two DVDs for him to watch and listen to during his free time.

168's a pretty good place to shop for the budget-conscious. Just go there early to secure parking and avoid the crowds that come in by 11:00 am. Watch over your bag and valuables as you never know what may hit or strike you (read: pickpockets, mashers, bag slashers). Contrary to what others say, shop there in your most comfortable attire; porma is definitely optional. And yes, bring lots of cash to produce lots of purchases!

I just wish it was nearer and easier to commute to from home.

PS. Happy birthday Mama! I may be not as affectionate and physically present as I should be, but never forget that you're the number one woman in my life. I love you!